Ego Death by Julie Beloussow
20″ x 24″ Acrylic on canvas

To be honest, it didn’t make sense for me to make a topic out of “The Theory of Love vs The Practice of Love”, still, I needed to write about it.

Few hours past midnight, after my birthday, I felt a weird emotion. I call it weird as I am still uncertain on how to properly define it.

I mean, I had a great day. Such a good one but when I finally got the chance to relax, I felt overwhelmed with emotions; mostly good ones anyways.

Well, while everyone currently in my life are part of what I call the best humans in my world, I must say that my sister; Oluchi Ogwumah, my God Sister; Giovanna Osawaru and my Cousin; Esther Udoh are part of the bestest people on earth.

I say this because the best people in life bring out the best in you. There are no two ways about it.

Well, back to the subject matter, in trying to trace what could be the root cause of that “weird feeling” I was feeling, I discovered it was from my subconscious expectations; people who didn’t send me wishes or post my pictures.

You see, very few people are able to own up to the disappointment of their expectations and for a split-second, I almost or I actually did but deleted a tweet that went about “I’m cool with people not liking me”

No! Ezinne likes people but hates the heat and tension of conflict, but she also understands that the world we live in, is complex.

So, at that moment when I checked in with myself and discovered the reason for what and why I was feeling the things I felt, my only resort was to go to God in prayer.

One line “Help me love even when I am not loved”

That line brought to mind what Jesus said in Matthew 5:43-48

You have heard that it was said, ‘Love your neighbor and hate your enemy.’ But I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, that you may be children of your Father in heaven. He causes his sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous. If you love those who love you, what reward will you get? Are not even the tax collectors doing that? And if you greet only your own people, what are you doing more than others? Do not even pagans do that? Be perfect, therefore, as your heavenly Father is perfect.”

So, yeah! As easy as the theory of love may seem, you can agree it is the hardest thing to practice.

THIS IS BECAUSE LOVE IS HARD TO GIVE WHEN THE EGO IS ALIVE.

So yeah! Keep your Love and don’t snuff out your light!

Love and Light!!!!!

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