Hey there, been ages *blows the dust off my keypads*
I struggle to define what it has been with me. However, the words that come to mind is distracted, hectic, slightly confused, sad, frustrated and generally tired.
I had to put my feelings into words…as the last resort though, in a bid to keep my feelings in check.
For the year 2022, my reality is far off from my many desires, wishes, and prayers.
Though working and slaying my new body weight **thanks to my just completed 40 days lent fast** is a plus.
My lent didn’t lent as it should, and I’m not living life as I expected.
A thing of consolation is this random prayer I received from a friend…
Amen, Amen and Amen
However, attempts to be and do good has rather found me touring the pathway to hell, many steps forward and a few steps back to the light.
Who said being a child of God was going to be easy?
Well, I am waiting on the good time, looking forward to the joy that comes in the morning and day after day, still holding on to the hope that, it (joy) might just be around the corner of the next morning.
For the things that bring joy to my soul (writing, reading, solitude and introspective conversation), I find myself farther and farther away from them.
Why? To hold on and go after the very thing that is said to be rooted in this crazy principality called “Evil” **it’s all about the money you know**
Still, zero caution can be truly be taken, if one is solely focused on the material rather than the spiritual.
Also, my reservations at becoming what I’ll call “a religious fanatic”, longing for manna to fall from heaven, forgetting that I am not in a desert and either do I have a “Moses” & “Aaron” spiritually leading me to the promised land.
Oh well, while I’m trying to figure out the how of adulting, I’m hoping and waiting for the good times to begin for me and last a good while.
I crave for Joy in my mornings.
Love and Light 💞